Table of contents:
- About the author
- Books by Dale Carnegie
- Pedagogical activity
- Shoemaker without boots
- 1. Don't criticize
- 2. Express your admiration to people and do it sincerely
- 3. Be interested in people
- 4. Do you want to receive? Learn to give
- 5. Eight words that can change your destiny
- Carnegie's most famous quotes
The ability to communicate is a real art. Having mastered it, you will be able to convince people to do as you need, to attract them to your side, to be an interesting conversationalist and respected by all people, to make the acquaintances and connections you need, to make new friends. How to learn all this? Read the classics!
We offer you an overview of the work of Dale Carnegie. Aphorisms, quotes and wisdom of this brilliant American psychologist will give answers to many life questions.
About the author
The name of Dale Carnegie is known to all people who have ever been interested in issues of personal growth. Writer and teacher, psychologist and lecturer, outstanding speaker. He did not discover anything new, but managed to collect and summarize the scientific works of many great psychologists, as well as develop an effective system for teaching the main principles of success in life.
Dale Carnegie was born into a family of very poor farmers in 1888. Already during his college years, teachers noted that the boya clear talent for oratory. His brilliant performances at the college debating club aroused the admiration and envy of fellow students. At that time, young Dale was already being asked to give public speaking lessons.
Perhaps it was then that the boy realized that he could earn money on this. He wanted to teach farmers what he could do well - speak beautifully and persuasively. But at first the idea was not successful. Dale had to look for a job. He became a grocery sales agent. However, he did not abandon the idea of opening his own school.
The young man begins to actively study the works on psychology and sales. Having collected the necessary amount, in 1912 Carnegie opened a school of oratory, which immediately became very famous. There are no empty seats at his lectures. In the course of his work, Dale understands that in addition to the desire to speak correctly, people have a strong desire to learn interpersonal communication. This skill becomes especially indispensable for finding potential customers and persuading them.
Carnegie starts writing books to get his ideas across to more people. How to get rid of fears and depression? How to attract people and interact with them? These and many other questions he covers in detail in his works. Writing works are a huge success and very quickly bring fame and fortune to their creator.
Today, Dale Carnegie's books are still popular and in demand, and their publications are published in multimillion copies.
Books by Dale Carnegie
In 1936, a huge circulation (over 4million copies), Dale Carnegie's legendary book How to Win Friends and Influence People was published. She made the author a very we althy person. For more than a dozen years, the publication has been popular with readers, because the Carnegie system, wise quotes and aphorisms of the writer really worked.
The book taught:
- influence people without showing aggression;
- easy to make personal and business contacts;
- find a common language with any interlocutor;
- be able to have a friendly conversation.
The book "How to stop worrying and start living" has helped tens of thousands of people overcome the problems and difficulties of life. The author tells the reader in simple words, using illustrative examples, how to cope with fears and depressions. And how, no matter what, to remain a happy and positive person. Ordinary people followed his advice and got out of crisis situations, gained faith in their strength and received a boost of energy for further activities.
Dale Carnegie wrote seven books in total. All of them are published in numerous editions and translated into many languages. Today, the books of one of the main teachers of mankind are completely disassembled into aphorisms and quotes.
As an excellent lecturer and popular writer, Dale Carnegie also proved to be a talented teacher. He has trained thousands of lecturers and trainers who teach people around the world how to communicate and successfully solve their problems. The writer founded a university, an institute,training company. Educational institutions have dozens of branches around the world.
Carnegie's parenting quotes have long been familiar to people. And often we do not even know that these words belong to the great author: “A strong desire to learn something is already 50% of success.”
Shoemaker without boots
Now many scold the psychologist and his legacy. Critics say that while teaching and instructing others, he himself had great problems in life. The two marriages of the writer cannot be called successful. There is also an opinion that Carnegie committed suicide.
It's hard to be a loving spouse and caring father when your whole life is scheduled by the clock for a long time ahead. The official version of Carnegie's death is considered a serious incurable disease. And, alas, no one is immune from this. However, these circumstances do not at all detract from the significance and importance of the brilliant work of the writer's life.
The great interpersonal master continues to give advice and guidance through his famous aphorisms and quotes.
1. Don't criticize
Famous Carnegie quote: “Criticism is a sure way to make enemies. Do you want to be alone? Criticize.”
By expressing your criticism to a person, even with the best of intentions, you force him to look for excuses and ways of protection, as if informing the opponent that you doubt his rightness and significance. Resentment and resentment will be the only reactions to your words.
Rough (albeit fair) criticism can do thingsa lot of trouble. In an emotionally vulnerable person, your open aggressive assessment can cause psychological problems in the form of a variety of fears and phobias. Hold back, do not speak after the first emotional impulse. Take a breath and calm down. Only then make a soft and correct remark. For this, use not a direct complaint ("Your endless delays are already bothering everyone in the department"), but an indirect remark ("Employees being late to work annoy our customers, I would not like to work in a nervous state all day").
You can't do without criticism, because mistakes need to be corrected. But it should be served correctly and dosed. Never make claims to the very personality of a person, make comments only in relation to his actions:
- "Your report is very poorly done!" - wrong.
- "There are errors in your report, they need to be corrected" - correct.
2. Express your admiration to people and do it sincerely
Another popular Dale Carnegie quote: “Everyone deserves admiration. And you too.”
Admiring people, you get the fastest response. Just do it sincerely. No need to flatter. False attempts at manipulation through outright flattery will only set the interlocutor against you. There are qualities worthy of true praise in every person.
Analyze how you feel about yourself? Do you always give yourself the opportunity to speak out or justify yourself? Try to treat the other person the same way. And dislikeretreat, and friendliness and sympathy will take its place. By adhering to this manner of communication, you can find a good friend and feel a surge of happiness and kindness in your own soul.
Seek what is admirable in people and you will never be the loser.
3. Be interested in people
A wonderful Carnegie quote to memorize and follow every day: "To be a good conversationalist, you must first learn to listen."
Look around, look inside yourself. Any person, including you, wants everyone to listen to him and talk only about him. During a conversation, people often do not understand each other, because they are only interested in their own person. It would seem a vicious circle. But how easy it is to fix everything!
Pay attention to people, remember their names, take an interest in their affairs. Try to gladly fulfill small requests (of course, without prejudice to personal interests). Notice how people look. Celebrate any new thing in clothes or hairstyle. Give a sincere compliment about this. You will get a huge feedback immediately.
People will be drawn to such benevolence and indifference. New buyers and clients will come to you, and then they will bring their acquaintances. And all thanks to simple attentiveness and courtesy. It's just that you remember the name of this particular person and his beloved dog.
4. Do you want to receive? Learn to give
Truly the golden rulebehavior is formulated in one of Carnegie's best quotes: “Mentally put yourself in the place of another person in order to understand what he needs, and not you. Whoever can do this will have the whole world, whoever can't will not have a soul.”
Are you hoping to get something from the other person? Do not rush to voice your requirements. The principle “I want, but you must” does not work. Think about what this person wants. And then try exactly that and offer him.
Does your child not want to put away toys? Why? But because it's boring, and the kid wants to have fun and play. Come up with a story about a superhero who saves the world from disorder and chaos. Make a suitable mask or costume. And let the "defender of humanity" save the earth from evil, and at the same time save his room from scattered toys.
Do you want to get a place to trade in a prestigious trading house? Tell the landlord that you are planning daily discounts on popular products, and you will be handing out brochures to customers advertising not only their products, but also the trading house itself. Also, let me know about other ideas and promotional projects that are beneficial to him. As a result, you can easily get the desired space. In addition, they will magically appear in the most advantageous and passable places.
Talk to people about what they want to achieve by telling them how they can achieve it. This approach does wonders for effective communication.
5. Eight words that can change your destiny
Magic Carnegie Quote:“Our life is what our thoughts make it.”
Never berate yourself! Come up with a punishment for bad thoughts, such as squats. Caught yourself in the negative - 10 squats!
Think positive. Your thoughts are attracted by real events. Find something joyful in your life, even if it is small and insignificant. Cling to it and feel the happiness that fills your soul. Do it now.
Do you want to be happy? Be!
Smile at yourself in the mirror and at people on the street. A kind person always inspires confidence. And the smile itself serves as a kind of signal of sympathy and favor.
Carnegie's most famous quotes
- "If you suddenly feel like changing someone, start with yourself."
- "Stay as if you are already happy. And after a while you will definitely feel happy."
- "Rudeness kills love. Be polite to your family as well as to strangers."
All this was said many decades ago, but it is still relevant today. Be that as it may, no matter what skeptics say about the life of Dale Carnegie, the aphorisms and quotes of this great connoisseur of human souls helped many of his contemporaries and still help to achieve success in communication, become effective leaders and just live a happy serene life. Isn't that the point?